You cannot change people, they are who they are.
You need to accept them for who they are, not what you expect them to be.
This is not always easy because we have expectations for people.
If who they are doesn’t fit with us or our lives, the only choices we can make is what we will do. Maybe we spend less time, maybe we try to create shared goals we work towards together. It is our lives so we need to make the best decision based on what we can control.